How it all happened ...

I mean after a nigga graduated , it was straight to that hustle for a job . I became successful at this task and was making good money . Welcome to my Diary ....

Working became a normal routine and it kinda felt bad to lose a good thing with nothing but promises...

Ham

i did it because IT felt good to go HAM .
Ham ,  i destroy a stance THAT i was once in .
because of the anger ... I never got the chance to fly away
I held it , praying that i would just burp it out .
But because of that anger , i went ham . 

I am truly sorry and truly regret the situation but i do not regret going ham .
I mean can you really be that mad at me ?
I believe you would have ran a lap after me .
That's why sometimes deep down inside i know it's wrong but i really do hate you . The NEW YOU . 
Not my mother but her new mentality .
I went ham , thought it was hilarious in the end . 
Now i just pray that God with have a conversation with me in the end . That he will at least tell me what I did wrong .
But until that spontaneous day , I will have to go HAM !  

tylerJETS'

             my best friend , my one call away . My little
                brother . dude i envision with that 600benz .
                lyrical monster , but brothers
                since we was watching cookie monster .
                the future! , respect is giving to one another
                 two genius in our own way . Dude is a beast
                on the mic , im a animal with the computer
                    well with the letters . little brother ,
             im getting lazy . But all you need to know is that i love you ... and hip-hop is for you ... dnt forget me boyyy , THEGOD gon see SOON  . I wanna be with you pop boy .. its 5's forever . Pass that flag .                                    
                                            slob's
                                    put the game on bricks'

JoeGentry... in 2011 .

                                             Graduation ???????  

Is God getting me together ?

Mess is insane !!!

I think him for it though .

John .... is in my headphones right now ( Wayne )

i don't know what to doooo ...

P.S , this is free writing ... no thought at all .

What imma do after high school ?????

I'm sooo excited ... ( purple writing btw) , 2011 !

mONEY FROM job ='s WEED .

life sooo good .

that prized GOLD from my girlfriend/wife . ;)

all day everyday .

sky is blue while we are at the park with my SON .

" no little boy sit down pleaseeeee , " calls i can't wait to shout . All that cherry codeine in my cup for valetine day ... don't judge me .

I am only Joe Gentry . , opw 2011" i believe ! :)

GovernmentINMATE .

    Maybe if bigJoe would have gotten 5years and some months instead of the plain 5 he would be here right now. The baby wasn't allowed to the funeral , was that for the better or worst. He felt that he could go from a compact car to a mercedes or porsche. I have a little sister that I don't even know. Maybe her name is Mercedes or porsche. Drugs gave him death, and those items soothes me . Death is underrated. And i would receive it for the opportunity to have a convo with him. 11years later and that babyboy may be insane. That babyboy has a sister that he will never meet. All because Joe Nathan Morris got 5years exactly and not 5years and some months.
                                                                        "nigga killed him. him being my dads.
                                                                                                                                                that babyboy being me. G.O.D..."

december20, 2009 .

 life is possibly overated.. maybe i could do better without it . Don't become worried. I'm not suicidal . Maybe this is not a convo to be having 5days before christmas. Out of bout 6billion people on this planet, only possibly 3mil can tell you the true meaning of Christmas. I DIDNT pray in so long. I'll rather smoke weed. Should I just take the Kanye West approach and blare everything out . _____ skipping school is a first option , telling angie is like the thousandth . I would rather quote wayne verses then verses from the bible. Still have no idea of what imma do when that times come...OUTTA HIGHSCHOOL... 16years old and who cares? I sure don't. CHRACKKkills?? wow what a clique. I'm possibly a sociopath. Shoes get cleaned and polish more then my body does. All these freaks in my phone and my one true love is gonee...300MILES away.
                 If i had that chance to meet.....

11:30am.

11:30am...    
    Im in 2nd block at O' Perry Walker groggy from two "white boys" of kush.

Those who don't really understand what that means... The things you do sober at perfection, I do at a brilliance when I'm high. So imagine while i'm sober. Im not bragging, just hitting you in your mentalis with some real realities. I do get in trouble at home, not really at school. I am a nerd that smokes weed in my everyday surroundings, according to some of my peers........... "TO BE CONTINUED"...

weed=troubles.,???

I laughed at dudes that I seen on movies smoking weed.

I thought that getting involve with weed was just jokes and laughs. Weed is killing people TODAY. I am a addict so I cannot get away from the effects of my drug. Weed is BAD yea, but it is GOOD too. Now I dream about quiting and then wake up out that dream to go smoke. I love it if even... Don't judge me people. Forgive me Lord. I once was a product of my enviroment. Now I lead in a way..... look out my eyes.

Jeramey I love you, I didn't change untill you died on me.

my soul passed when he did. So I now smoke every curse word that my mother screams at me, every guilty sense I get when my grandmaw gives me money. IT HURTS ME knowing I spend her money on that.   I kills me to know that I am like my pops. "This is my game, bless everyone in the stands". -Lil wayne.

Everybody on this planet is blessed with atleast one ART.      EVERY PERSON. 

Mines just happen to elite from cannibis into my writing.

Watch me as I create my mastepiece.  

" This is a product under weed,

respect it. condone my words. 

Please don't shoot me down ,

   That Ak with the drum and the beam could not Shoot me out the sky.
   Maybe I'll see a Robin, Pelican, or a Hawk.
   The heavens are in my eyesights, my fingertips.
   And I just seem to believed that God smiles at my happyness
The devil is not grabbing at my feet anymore, and I'm floating with an angel.
   My brother and dad are embracing me with the love I never got.
  I can see the future like I had three eyes. And SHE'S my caretaker.
  I'm flying over trees and elephants. Over zebras and pandas.
   God has giving me paradise. God has giving me love.                                 God has giving me the chance, the opportunity to find that person to make me fly.                                                                                                            Now its my chance to show him that I will do it with good intentions. That I will not be like my parents
That being this high is a giving, and not just something everybody will have a chance at.
God has giving me wings, and a condom..... To say fuck all the negativity on the ground and just fly far far away.
People die EVERYDAY for/over what I was giving, and the only thing I am trying to kill is time.
I'm tryimg to get her back in my arms and freeze time at the perfect moment, so that she's stuck in my hold forever. But is forever bearable enough?,Do I even deserve her and that opportunity to flyyyyyyy.......?

Maybe God doesn't want me to stay high, or to EVEN HAVE her in my grasp
                                                    Only time will tell.

i'll die without you...

   i'll die without your heart.
Without that I have nothing to love on.
   i'll die without your touch.
That's where I get the most pleasure.
   i'll die without your conversation.
Reason why I get up at 8 in the morning and pick with you.
  i'll die without your song.
I want to endure that before I walk out the door every morning.
  i'll die without your answers.
In some situations, I can't bear to lead myself.
  i'll die without your kiss.
Your body in contact with mines is my bath after a long day at work.
  i'll die without your pain.
I wish not to deal with life's trouble without you.
  i'll die without your arrogance.
I need you to show it all so I could show you off to the ones I love the most.
 i'll die without your rebirth.
many more life's to go...I hope we could share them together.
 i'll die without you dirtyness.
I need something to clean up on when I'm also dirty.
 i'll die without your faithfullness.
You the only person I wish to have the opportunity to trust.
 i'll die without your emotion.
I want to hear you cry when I don't have the courage to do it
 i'll die without your smile.
When my surroundings and physical standards keep me from doin such a action..You could be my smile<

-i'll cry for you

From George to Ben.

See for the money, people would really

take what you built up and step on it with some timbaland boots.

For the money people would shoot theirselves let alonq others...

See for the money an true savage from New Orleans would kill their own mother.

For the "Bens" I know an dude that would really beat you up and rip your tongue out while your still alive.

For the money people would plot to kill the most qivinq individual known.

For the love of money...people would talk to the police (snitching)

For those green sheets of trees,.people would bomb an whole buildinq filled with american citizens.

See for what this man has.,a person would plot on killing him for that.

                                              Money and doinq what it takes for it??.,.

                Im surprise BillGates is still ALIVE.,

russianROULETTE.

or maybe

or even

When the levees..When the planes hit..whats qoinq on my n----

the same sh.t.

All this stuff is happeninq to the world and we still could chanqe the channel when we see those sick little 3rd world children on the television.

I personally pray for the progress to get better. But all today's people care about is their money and theirselves. I could relate to the situations. Global warminq...pollution..murder...the economy...racism...=life as "Americans"..NOOOOO..HUMANS!!

I think about suicide everyday.,I don't think its the only option,.but it is a way to get away from what i've dealt with for the last 17 years. The only problem with that is that im toooooo scared to leave what the future may be for me and my family.


To get away from alllll these pains..I result in weed...its not healthy,.but it helps...its not that weed is bad...ITS THAT AMERICA'S GOVERNMENT IS NOT GETTING ANY MONEY FROM IT SO IT'S ILLEGAL.,.

Point is: Wars should not exist,.Poverty should only be an past paragraph,.

Racism should have died when MLK died.,. I can't lie I think about playinq russian Roulette everyday.,.

                              "But instead of one bullet,.lets try all six off them"

hiphop broke my ♥...

  I never was alive to witness what REAL music was...now im stuck with its remains. Hiphop-rap is what my head is wrapped around the most.,.I take it more serious than school sometimes. I could sit down and debate who's the best all niqht. Our generation is scarred and taqqed with the fact that the older generations of music hates us and what we rap for. Theres only a handful of people in today's music that really talks about ANYTHING. ITS only really murder and weed on my ipod. I guess its just somethinq I was born into. Now today's music is what is the ingredient to makinq people qo crazy. All that violence in today's sonqs really make you want to do crime. Not mee,.rap calms me down,.(welllll it depends on the sonq i choose to listen to.) If you was to cut on my ipod riqht now all you would scoll over is lil wayne and his music group "young money". Why I chosed to only really listeninq to him.? First hes from New Orleans (uptown) and his lyrics is homebased..wayne is lyrically insane.! and he has nothinq to lose...WE CAME FROM NOTHING.,.New Orleans.Louisiana.. Don't qet it wrong,.I don't wish to be ah entertainer.,.Im am only just ah critic tryinq to qet ah point across.,..

As far as the "older generation not likinq younqer generation thinq", prime example...(if you are really fans of music) you should have recalled the soulija boy and ice-t beef. Ice-t really felt that S.B. was makinq hiphop worst than what it had to be. I agreed with him in a certain way. I personally don't like S.B. and I believe he has no place in the music business. But at the same time you cannot not knock his hustle. The point is that the objective of an entertainer is to satisfy your fans.. If you could take one fan away and sell one album,.you've done your job.. your just qoinq to be a very broke rapper, sinqer, hypeman if you sell one album lol.,..

Lil Wayne (left) and The Game.>

Chrackk's folktale part 4: Cornell,.

  At first (to me) dude was really just another character tryinq to play bad. Gettinq to really know him, I really realized that he is a bad ass dude. Rap...murder..and weed is what he lives by. He's basically in a way my bestfriend (as corny as that sounds). We really have a crazy way of showinq it. In our generation,.people just dont introduce theirselves to one another. Somethinq has to happen to where one feels comfortable with another. For me and him, it was the band. We both played horns. I played trumpet and he played b.tone. We are both really class clowns,..joke around and make people lauqh...sooooo we just taqqed alone everywhere."You want to come by me chrackk?",."smoke somethinqq nell"...now I really don't walk out the door without lettinq him know what im I about to qet into. My momma met him, and I believe from the first time she laid eyes on him...she believed that he was no qood....She threw "slanqs",. but i just pretended that I didn't know what she was talkinq about. Everybody know what his whole "swaqq" is. "F.CK HER AND F.CK" HIM IF THEY DON'T AGREE WITH ME AND ME DECISIONS.",.Dude don't really come to school alot either and he's very smart,.I tried to be a qood friend and let him know that success is hard without education but you cannot tell a qrown man anythinq soooo he just do his thinq. Im there for him in any kind of way possible and I love him in the stranqest way noticeable. Sometimes I put him and what he wants out of me at the moment before what my momma wishes for me to do.  Deep down inside (I don't want to say this) but he's not qoinq to live that lonq. Is that why I really do what he askes me so we end on a qood note?

                                                                        If GOD wrote the sonq,.I have no option but to sinq it.

Chrackk's folktale part 3: Iriel,.

   Cominq back from Atlanta after my brother (Jeramey) died,. I started my 9th qrade year at alqiersTECH across the river in Alqiers.,.It took me awhile before I really start makinq friends and Iriel was my first "lil friend". She already had a boyfriend but at that period of time I wasn't tryinq to be her boyfriend..I really just like her attitude and her wits.,.she was ah lil tiqer.,.I was into that type of stuff so I [eventually] start developinq the mindstate that I wanted to take her from her boyfriend and I was SUCESSFULL.!,. I was really was scared to come out and be like "Irie i LIKE YOU" soooooo online on myspace she really seriously and playfully came out and said "Joe I LIKE YOU". I took it as ah confidence booster. She had ah boyfriend and talked to me on the phone everyniqht.=),.the situation was very interestinq and sad at the same timee.,I didnt want to disrespect her boyfriend at all because, he was a real cool dude..I JUST WANTED HIS GIRL.!,. so in the end, she broke up with him and started to messinq with ME......                                                                      

I was really bad at Tech., and to make a lonq story short I qot put out of Tech.,. sooooo I could not really see her,....  Problems with her mother and their family forced them to move to houston at the end of that second year that I did not attend Tech.,.Now its 2010 and I qo to clark. She qoes to school out there,.[but she is out here like EVERYWEEKEND.!]  I never have to miss her.. I love that qirl sooooo much...I DON'T HAVE THE TIME TO TYPE THE STUFF WE BEEN THOUGH.,.... J.IRIE.!!

 The people hiqhest up has the lowest self-osteem..

                                                                                 -Kanye west

Chrackk's forktale part 2: Jordan.

      Jordan Nehemiah Gentry is the babies's name. My little brother is an character. I personally love messinq with him and, beinq a really MEAN older siblinq. Me and Jordan have different dadies so we don't really look alike. My little brother (I admit) is more attractive than me as a boy. But I still find thinqs to justify him about. He's really ah biq baby sometimess so I REALLY MESS WITH HIM. He's also a pest twoo. He could find the worst time that I really don't feel like beinq bothered and, pick that away twoo when I want to fiqht. I love that little dudee thouqh i promise you. Me and him talk more than me and anqie really converse and thats very interestinq twoo me.,.He really knows about all that bad sh.t that I claim that I perform. If you wanna know where Im at and I don't want twoo tell you where im at..he will KNOW and he will tell.!,.Thats not the way I choose,. thats how my situation collapses. I promise tho,.God could not have blessed me and my momma with ah better baby than Nehemiah.,.He's this..He's this..but in the end of the day he's ah Gentry and thats his only backup sometimes.lol). I just really start realizinq that he looks up twoo me. Im really the only person that  dresses (in my family) how I dress now.(skinny jeans and ah HOTTOPIC T-SHIRT).,I mean Im from New Orleans and thats really biq huqe t-shirts and some hanqinq jeans[i like twoo think Im different.,.Jordan has really picked up my dressinq styles and I smile at that..,.....He is always qoinq twoo be ah Gentry..No matter how much I can't stand him or hate him.,.ADOISS.!

Chrackk's folktale part 1: Anqie.

            I have ah mark on my leq from my mother not payinq attention twoo me when I was small. I was told that I was an very nosey baby, and playinq with the ironboard one day the hot iron fell on my leg and now my mark or scar is there FOREVER. Anqelia Gentry is her name and an interestinq lady she iss. She uses her voice and mouth allllllllllllllllllllllll dayy.She fusses at me and nehemiah (jordan) allllllllllllllllllllll day. I quess we qive her reasons twoo.??..She's not mean but i can tell you that she would DRIVE you crazy.,.I love anqie but honestly i can't stand her.Me and her is always qettinq into it. The way I see it,....we both have attitudes and smartmouths. We both say how we feel to its full potential. She really makes me mad sometimess.....I qo to school and qet the best qrades ever..and at the end of the day when i qet home from a long day at school...shes either at home and shes calling my phone fussinq.. Shes the type to fuss when i've done wronq but don't say "good job" when i've done good. She qets alonq with jordan so well because he let her run all over him. I personally dont qive ah f.ck.,. She doesn't even know that i smoke WEED. Its not that im afraid twoo tell anqie but i feel this is pay back for qettinq on my nerves sooooooo much....She was never like that untill she lost Jeramey (my deceased brother) after katrina in Atlanta....[thats where we moved at after the storm hit the city. She was sooooooo sweet and lovable before then. Now that incident has really chanqed her persona. So maybe i should understand her then because i've been with her since day one,..But sometimes I think even GOD be like huhhhhhh.?????

one foot out the door she says..

Introduction., becominqq chrackk'

         My name is Joe Nathan Gentry the 4thh.(but i go as "Chrackk"). I'm from the "east"., an small little part of New Orleans. I have two brothers but one is now deceased from cerebral palsy now its just me, Angie(mother), and my brother Jordan(the baby). I attend Joseph S. Clark as an sophomore and school is really an waste of time to some of my peers. But since they don't care about school does that make them peers.??. I go to school just about everyday.,but not sober.!!., I smoke a lot of weed.!!,.but get 100's on finals.,. I am surrounded by killers and lowlifes and there's nothing the principal can really do because basically he doesn't care either . This is the life as a New Orleans male and I'm proud to know that I'm going to get out of that environment and do something with myself..90% of that school and New Orleans schools isn't. I'm a black braced face joker.,.I been through a lot of sh.t,. so i keep laughing to hide that pain..Money is not really in my life right now and I'm currently trying to find a job but its hopeless. I barely could support my habit...Is it really a habit.??,.I hope not....TO ALL MY PRESENT AND FUTURE READERS: I'VE BEEN IN SOME CRUCIAL AND INTERESTING SITUATIONS.,.I PROMISE, YOU ARE GOING TO LEAVE MY PAGE WITH EITHER AN SMILE OR AN "I FEEL SORRY SMIRK"......ADOISS,..GET READY

The first thinq you see when you look at this picture is...the druq..or my skincolor.?,.